Once upon a time there were three sad queens. Queen Daffney, Queen Mexican Monkey and Queen Hulk. They were sad because it was fucking cold outside and not much to do with the bad weather. So the three sad queens got together and decided to decorate the house.
"Girlfriends, it will be so much fun," Queen Hulk said in her princess phone.
"Will there be booze?" Queen Mexican Monkey asked.
"Will I have to shell out any money?" Queen Daffney asked.
"Fuck no and yes there will be booze, just like there is a Santa Claus, there will always be booze." Queen Hulk told them and so they got together after Thanksgiving to plan a splendid time.
"What should we call it?" asked one queen.
"Let's call it, 'Make it Pretty Day," said one.
"Lame as shit. How about, 'Burn the House Down', said the other.
"No you fucking dumb-ass bitches," said the third, "We'll call it Christmas."
"Why the fuck Christmas?" asked the other two.
"It's for, 'Christ, how much did that cost you?' Christmas for short, " said the third queen.
So they got out some sparkle and spangle, They brought in lights and show tunes and by the time dark fell, the joint looked like a Hansel and Gretel cottage.
"What fun," said the Three Queens.
"Pass the joint, and where did you put the wine bottle?" said the other.
"I just love Christmas, " said the third as she dialed for pizza.
No comments:
Post a Comment