Cops in the Hood

On the way to the store on my bicycle, I looked down the alley. A very necessary thing to do even when walking because of all the stupid drivers in L.A. In fact, I'm not the only one that has a low opinion of L.A. residents. It turns out that tourists rank us as one of the most stupid and ill mannered of all cities in the United States. Not a very nice title, but I've had drivers honk at me because I wanted to cross the street on a green light when they felt they had the right, being bigger, to make a right turn while I wait on the curb for them to finish it. The drivers think nothing of blocking the whole crosswalk and ignore you while they watch for a break in the traffic. And if you don't step out, the next one will be there to block you again. That's really rude.

Our alley gets a lot of traffic. If the main drag backs up. They flow down the alley like a river filled to its banks. They speed because of being pissed off for having to wait. They honk their fucking horns the whole way, never mind it's a neighborhood, it's not their hood so what the fuck do they care.

The cops were near the house, it could have been the east bunker of the Jihad Party Boys. The cops might be looking for W.M.D's or some shit like that. There were two cops and both out of the car. I did see Drag Queen earlier when I was tending to the chickens. Drag Queen looked a bit hung over. Her fat ass sure hung over and her makeup looked put on with a paint roller. Poor bitch was a mess.

I blame her damn eunuch. Lazy thing probably doesn't get up until the afternoon and no one wants to bother a sleeping eunuch. Hell, you have to push your hand into the soft folds of eunuch flesh just to wake them. And then they make the damnest noises when you do. I don't blame Drag Queen for waking the eunuch by throwing a stone at one of its ass checks. But then you have a pissed off eunuch to put on your makeup and that is always a mistake.

Drag Queen needs to get some new tights. Her ass has stretched the pair she was wearing to the brink of tearing right down the seam. And if that happened, the ass wouldn't stop folding out until it hit pavement. Which would make it asshault instead of asphalt.

What could it be that the cops were in the alley by the eastern Bunker? The Jihad Party Boys have been quiet of late. Must be weapons of mass destruction. I'll call Cheney and see what's up.