Are You Being Served?

The caddie has been acting a bit ill. After spending almost a thousand on repair so the old girl could past the smog test, we thought it should run very well but it doesn't. The caddie has this hesitation when you step on the gas, especially when the engine is cold.

A friend, riding in the car one night said, "Just get a cleaner for the gas, one full tank and the cleaner will get rid of that."

So we went to a local auto store. There were practically no customers in the store, or for that matter, any store, the heat was horrendous today. A man behind the counter asked if he could help.

"I'm looking for something that you add to your gas and it cleans the engine, a friend of mine said to try it."

"How do you know that you need it?"

"I don't, I just thought I would try it before going to the mechanic."

"Has the mechanic replaced your gas filter?"

"I really can't say, he did replace everything for it to pass smog inspection."

"Well, you should look at your receipt and see if he replaced the gas filter."

"I guess I should, but I thought I try this first."

"If it doesn't work, you'll be back in here, yelling your head off that I sold you a bogus product."

"Trust me, I won't do that. If it doesn't work I'll take it to the mechanic."

"When were you last at your mechanic?"

"Just earlier this month, and spent a bundle for the caddie to pass muster."

"You spent a bundle and you don't know if he replaced the gas filter?"

"I was happy to pass the smog."

"What year is the car?"

"89 I think."

"You don't know?"

"I don't know shit about cars. I know how to drive one and that's about it. Do you have a product called STP I think that's what my friend said to get."

He took me to a wide array of products, some made by a company called STP. "Well here they are but, like I said, if it doesn't work you'll be in here screaming that I sold you a bogus product."

I thought I would never, ever come back to his store, no matter if it worked or not, but seeing the size of the man, I thought who in their right mind would argue with him and grabbed one that cleaned everything, even the windows.

The product seemed to work. After adding it to the gas tank and filling up, by the time I was home the problem had stopped. But who knows? Tonight is the Hollywood Bowl and I can see the fat-ass caddie holding up a line of traffic to make the Beijing gridlock look like a daisy chain.