2013 and so far no one has stated it will be the end of the world. 2012 was full of end of times events. My neighbors, for one, were trying their damnest to end it, with Wally and me the filling in their Oreo battleground. Of course we're still here and so that didn't pan out except for some Hindu shit-head is suing us and the city. But you would think a year that has 13 in it would be it.
And with all the diversity, the hood has Queers, Fuckin' Hindu Shit-heads, Drag Queen, Hag, Daddy, Mean Queen with a bunch of Israelis screaming at each other, Muslim Terrorist, Armenian Mafia, Village Idiot, and Jihad Party Boys just to name a few. But this year, Lady of the Forest hasn't been around. Someone is living there but they come in late and leave early, another fucking weird anomaly.
Yep, with all of what's in the hood, if the end of the world was coming, it would start here.
Wally and I are dining on Lobster tonight. I took him on a walk, he was tired after, then a shower, dressed and laid down for a nap. He said, "Thank you for all you do." I haven't heard him speak a sentence in a long, long time. I told him I loved him and that I married him for better or worse, just didn't know the worse was coming up so soon. And then I said again, "I love you." And he said it back to me when I kissed him.
It was the highlight of the whole fucking year. Of all the things that have happened, Wally talking, out of nowhere, was right there at the top. And on the last day of the year! What is that?
HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Stories from living in Los Angeles
Monday, December 31, 2012
Tuesday, December 18, 2012
Can't Get A Gun So I Can Kill
I'm sitting here in a prison cell and can't get a gun to kill.
Don't want to kill no deer, no goat, no bear, no sheep
Want to kill the warden, the warden and his wife's cat.
Want to kill the guy next door, want to kill the piano player
I'm sitting here in a prison cell, the only man in America
That can't get no gun to kill. It's unconstitutional, It's a crime
To keep me here with no gun to kill. What if they come for me?
What if they want to kill me and I ain't got no gun to kill?
I'm sitting here in a prison cell, I know how to kill with a knife
With poison, with a trap, but I want a gun to kill. I want the bullet
To fly. To kill to maim, here in my prison cell I sit in want because
I can't get a gun to kill.
Don't want to kill no deer, no goat, no bear, no sheep
Want to kill the warden, the warden and his wife's cat.
Want to kill the guy next door, want to kill the piano player
I'm sitting here in a prison cell, the only man in America
That can't get no gun to kill. It's unconstitutional, It's a crime
To keep me here with no gun to kill. What if they come for me?
What if they want to kill me and I ain't got no gun to kill?
I'm sitting here in a prison cell, I know how to kill with a knife
With poison, with a trap, but I want a gun to kill. I want the bullet
To fly. To kill to maim, here in my prison cell I sit in want because
I can't get a gun to kill.
Thursday, December 13, 2012
Bomb Building Muslims Next Door
We were decorating for Christmas, and the party this Saturday when the FedEx man pulled up in front of Little Iran. He came to their door and knocked, no answer, yet all the cars were there, the Greeter and his wife's car plus the mysterious person that lives in their garage wearing a burka. We don't know if they are a male or female because the burka covers every inch of flesh. So, the FedEx guy rings the bell, no answer and he leaves the package on the front step.
We were about to yell to him to put the package down--carefully. But he was too quick and luckily the package didn't go off. As the package sat there we carefully went into the house and to the other side, taking mattresses from the bed for a shield. After an hour we came out and noticed that the package was either brought in or taken. We suspect that once the contents didn't explode, it was taken in and brought to the garage for assembly into their bomb making business.
They have been home, for the most part, ever since. It must be a tricky device that requires their full attention. Needless to say, Little Iran is not invited to the Christmas party. Little Israel is, well, more of a self invite, but I'm not worried about them making bombs. If Little Israel was going to get a bomb they would buy it. Little Iran makes everything, including the burkas.
If they weren't so secretive it wouldn't draw the attention that it does but they are. That and the lingo, all in Persian or whatever you want to call it. The one good thing is that their garage is on the other side from us. So if a mistake is made, it will blast the neighbors on that side. Not that it matters I suppose, the blast would probably put a hole in the ground three houses long.
Yes, I can say for certain that this holiday will come in with a bang.
We were about to yell to him to put the package down--carefully. But he was too quick and luckily the package didn't go off. As the package sat there we carefully went into the house and to the other side, taking mattresses from the bed for a shield. After an hour we came out and noticed that the package was either brought in or taken. We suspect that once the contents didn't explode, it was taken in and brought to the garage for assembly into their bomb making business.
They have been home, for the most part, ever since. It must be a tricky device that requires their full attention. Needless to say, Little Iran is not invited to the Christmas party. Little Israel is, well, more of a self invite, but I'm not worried about them making bombs. If Little Israel was going to get a bomb they would buy it. Little Iran makes everything, including the burkas.
If they weren't so secretive it wouldn't draw the attention that it does but they are. That and the lingo, all in Persian or whatever you want to call it. The one good thing is that their garage is on the other side from us. So if a mistake is made, it will blast the neighbors on that side. Not that it matters I suppose, the blast would probably put a hole in the ground three houses long.
Yes, I can say for certain that this holiday will come in with a bang.
Sunday, December 9, 2012
Christmas In Gaza
The house looks pretty good. Garland around the windows, wreaths hung,lights on the house, a Christmas tree decorated. It looks like Christmas and a party is scheduled for Saturday. There will be a piano player, bartender, well, the Mexican Monkey will be a bartender, if he can keep from getting drunk while tending bar, sandwiches, Santa Claus hats and lots of people. But with all that, it's kind of lonely.
Us and the neighbors directly across the street are the only ones that put up displays and neither of us are religious. Is Christianity dying out? It is here, Little Israel had some sort of ritual thing going on last night. Some kind of wailing song being sung and Little Iran was dark and quiet, which I guess they do this time of year. It's all sort of strange, a kind of other world look to the hood with two house directly across from one another lit up like it was Christmas and down the block on either side, nothing, just one house after another looking the same as they did six months ago.
So here we sit, all dressed up and no one else to dance with except each other. Me and the guy across the street, encouraging each other that the other has the best lights. Hell, the only lights for the holiday.
Even though I'm not religious, It is nice to spiff up the place for winter. It make it feel like winter by stringing lights and decorating trees. In fact, with religion out of the picture, it's more fun. There is no guilt factor, no sins to be forgiven or church services to attend. It makes for a better holiday and I suppose that someday, the lights, wreathes and festivities will turn into a seasonal thing rather than a religious thing and everyone will join in lighting up the hood, having a party and enjoying a cold winter day.
Us and the neighbors directly across the street are the only ones that put up displays and neither of us are religious. Is Christianity dying out? It is here, Little Israel had some sort of ritual thing going on last night. Some kind of wailing song being sung and Little Iran was dark and quiet, which I guess they do this time of year. It's all sort of strange, a kind of other world look to the hood with two house directly across from one another lit up like it was Christmas and down the block on either side, nothing, just one house after another looking the same as they did six months ago.
So here we sit, all dressed up and no one else to dance with except each other. Me and the guy across the street, encouraging each other that the other has the best lights. Hell, the only lights for the holiday.
Even though I'm not religious, It is nice to spiff up the place for winter. It make it feel like winter by stringing lights and decorating trees. In fact, with religion out of the picture, it's more fun. There is no guilt factor, no sins to be forgiven or church services to attend. It makes for a better holiday and I suppose that someday, the lights, wreathes and festivities will turn into a seasonal thing rather than a religious thing and everyone will join in lighting up the hood, having a party and enjoying a cold winter day.
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